Past, Present & Future

• Time for Reflection From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (505 days old)

  Phew, were does time go?!Where I'm I up to in my life...?I'm official unemployed and is it depressing, well that's what I should be feeling if I wasn't feeling so numb about everything. My last day wa… more

• An email and stamp = gift vouchers From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (537 days old)

  A week today I'm seeing M. It's been a while. End of March, in the hotel, is the last time he held me.I want to enjoy the few hours we have together. Holding hands, kissing, some lunch, shopping, thos… more

• Mountains to Climb From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (542 days old)

  I can't sum up where I am at the moment. Every direction of my life seems to be in limbo.I don't understand why I haven't had the motivation to write my thoughts and events on here recently either. An… more

• Is there more to life than TV, computer games and bloody neighbours? From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (548 days old)

  Answer on a post card please...Hmmm. Its been a mixed week. I was finally back in the office on Thursday which helped to give me a distraction from the god awful mess happening around me. Fairly uneve… more

• A River of Tears From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (553 days old)

  I'm not sure why I haven't been able to post for the last couple of weeks, scared of putting of this mess into print I guess. Not sure I've been in a state of mind to construct sentences, think it mig… more

• A Horrible Mess From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (565 days old)

  Not sure I can believe yet what I'm about to write, in fact I can feel the nausea rising up my body.Sunday was going to be about looking to the future and where I would be living to do that. Despite M… more

• Pillow Talk and Tears From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (572 days old)

  He's breaking me. He says the right things, he loves me, we'll be together, he's never felt like this before - physically or mentally and many more. So why are we miles apart and no where near be… more

• Decisions Decisions From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (572 days old)

  I've been a little scared to write the events of the last couple of days, seeing it in black and white highlights the reality of the situation.Tuesday resulted in a short and not very constructive pho… more

• Still Nothing... From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (575 days old)

  I want to be strong, really I do. I feel like I'm falling apart inside. I'm agitated, waiting for that beep of a message to tell me everything is OK. It's all just a misunderstanding but 4 full days o… more

• Nothing Hurts From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (577 days old)

  I have that sicken feeling in the pit of my stomach that rises into my chest and the back of my throat. I can't decide whether that's down to the lack of communication from M or the amount of taffy I'… more

• One Word Meme From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (577 days old)

  Where is your mobile phone? SofaYour significant other? WorkingYour hair? GlossyYour Mother? MadYour Father? HeroYour favourite thing? PhoneYour dream last night? ColouredYour favourite drink? Champag… more

• Checking In From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (579 days old)

  I feel bad if I don't post at least once a day as this is my self prescribed therapy until further notice. So I'm checking in with myself.No really change with work, still nothing to keep me occupied … more

• Cars, Trucks and Freaky Family From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (581 days old)

  Nothing; despite pressing send and received for the 100th time this morning. No email declaring he'd done the deed, left his wife and was on his way to get me.I had to know so initiated the conversati… more

• Highs and Lows From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (582 days old)

  The thought of dragging myself into work today didn't fill me with joy, the prospect of having nothing to do all day is exhausting and soul destroying.M's first email of the day was to the point. I'd … more

• Addictive and Annoying but Fun! Try it, You Might Like it From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (583 days old)

  www.miniclip.com/games/bloxorz/en/… more

• Back Down to Earth From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (584 days old)

  I wasn't sure I had much to write so I've left it until now. I sometimes start these entries thinking that they are going to be relatively short but they never are. I have a feeling this one is one of… more

• Gin and Tonic is the Poison Tonight! From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (585 days old)

  I do lack patience in most things, especially when I know what I want. I want M, a new fabulous job and a new home. Just like that! Yesterday I was full of cheer and hope, planning the start of my new… more

• Lobster, Chocolate Cake and Shoes From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (587 days old)

  BF is so predictable. I am rather curious as to why he is taking me out to our favourite restaurant, its not wildly expensive but its neither cheap. M is jealous... Thinks he's going to present me wit… more

• Happily Redundant From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (588 days old)

  I need to calm down but I can't I'm too excited. I've got lots to get out of my head so I can digest what's happened yesterday.WorkMNeighbour 2/Stalker BFWorkThe boss was out and there wasn't muc… more

• 7 Years Today - Happy Anniversary! From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (590 days old)

  I wrote this last night but didn't have the opportunity to post. Today is our anniversary of the day we met. I'd bought him a card with a sketch of the Eiffel Tower in Paris, our first city break a… more

• Training Must Start No Later Than 1st June From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (591 days old)

  In another attempt to focus on something else other than my ailing love life which I could sort in one fell swoop should I have inclination, I've just registered for the Race for Life. After having my… more

• An Evening in a Lenny Henry Hotel Room From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (591 days old)

  Fingers crossed did worked!! He left work round 11:30am to drop in at home to say bye to the kids before leaving for South Mimms services and the Premier Inn (not my choice I would like to add b… more

• My Italian Friend - Lemons, Lemons and More Lemons From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (593 days old)

  Thought I would write about something unrelated to my current misfortunes...Last June I met my friend D for the first time since we met 20 years ago. A family holiday in Sicily is where we met playing… more

• A Cheery Disposition... From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (593 days old)

  Its hard to describe the past few days. Its like I'm on a roller coaster, I can't get off nor can I scream out the words I feel inside. I was gradually falling into a dip as the day (yesterday) p… more

• Back to the Grindstone From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (595 days old)

  Back at work today and was anticipating what the day would bring with M. I didn't have to wait long, 9:07am to be precise. M: I guess you don't really want to hear from me for a while. … more

• A Sense of Relief From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (597 days old)

  It was what we were dreading, she'd found the emails. Apart from that fact she'd always checked his phone and email there was something to find this time. I wasn't surprised, M is hardly PC or phone l… more

• Shivers and Guilt From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (597 days old)

  We skirt around of the subject of us sleeping together, we can barely whisper the word, sex.  He wants to come down and stay over, as much as I want this to happen I can't help that sinking feel… more

• Three little words but not quite From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (598 days old)

  I really want this to be different this time with M. It feels different, like we're both on the same level of like for one another. He is very expressive about how he feels about me, generous with his… more

• M The Poet From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (599 days old)

  Hmmm. Last night was a bit random but needed to share with someone.Back to M.We know where we both stand, he has a wife and I live with my boyfriend. Our emails are varied from light chit chat to the … more

• This is what I mean From NorthernAngel in Past, Present & Future (600 days old)

  Tonight is an example of BF and making me feel like a dick. I'm exhausted from work where we're currently going through consultation to make 200 people redundant for the second time in 6 months. Fa… more

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